Full on Failure mode.
I appreciate my friend, Cynthia's, take on my thought of baba failure yesterday. That I hadn't tried yet so it was more procrastinating than failing.
Well, Cynthia, I have officially failed and I'm not sure if I'm that upset about it.
I seriously thought we had it. We did usual bedtime routine and then laid her down. She was a lot louder last night talking and naming things off. We only heard "baba" once and then a stream of "pink bear, Mama, Daddy." By her usual 8pm she was still and quiet but I knew something wasn't right because she was laying on her back which is not her usual sleeping position (she's more or a tummy sleeper, usually with a butt up in the air!)
At 8:30 I had to take a break and went to take a bath hoping that if I stopped thinking about it and watching her roll around in her crib all night would make her go to sleep. Nope. Dennis came in and said, "She's not sleeping. She's just screeching (not crying, mind you) and rolling around." By then it was almost 9pm and my mothering heart couldn't bear to take away anymore sleep time. So I went in and rocked her for at least 12 minutes. I could tell she was tired but she was not happy and I actually think she wasn't sure why!
I tried explaining she's a big girl now. Big girls don't need paci's (I tried not to use the word baba at this moment) and she just stared at me with her wonky little eyes (I'm her mother so I can see things like that and man, without glasses and with her so tired she had some very wonky eyes last night so another stab to my heart, right!?!)
She didn't seem to understand, or didn't want to understand, that she was a big girl now. I laid her back down in her crib and she immediately stood back up (missing the railing once to pull herself up - stab #3?) And she started crying. I almost thought, well, I'll just let her CIO which in my book is a step closer to sleep instead of rolling and screeching...but I couldn't.
*sigh*
I gave in. And poor sleepy baby was asleep in less than 5 minutes.
And now, I'm warring with myself. Did I give in too soon? Why did I think this would be so easy?! Is the baba such a bad thing right now?
A huge part of me wants to wait until she understand that she's not being punished but that this is a big girl big step! (This is also the part I will not start potty training until she can understand!)
I'm not sure when we'll try again. For now I know we're only going to give the baba at sleep times and that's it. No other times. No more digging in my diaper bag or handing a baba back in the car. Maybe I should just do baby steps and be content with that right now.
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I think baby steps sound perfect! I really think that sometimes these kids are still too little to understand everything and do need small steps towards change. You're doing a great job mama - sleep is important! Today is a new day. :-)
ReplyDeleteAnd like I said, giving in is ok too...do what you need to! I certainly can't take Molly's thumb away from her when she is sleeping.
ReplyDeleteI'm with Emily about the baby steps. Plus, TO ME, they're too young to understand the whole "you're a big kid now" logic. I'm sure giving up the paci will be huge for her and traumatic if that's her main method of soothing herself.
ReplyDeleteYou're doing the best you can, and you rock, anyways! :)