Being Content

Lately I have been struggling with something that I think we all struggle with - jealousy. It is ugly and guilt-provoking and it takes a lot in me to recognize what it is and push it away. There is a quote I came across that I have been going back to a lot these days

"Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; but remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for." 


Right!? So true.

So when I am feeling jealous-guilty-sad-upset about what others have that I do not have, I do a few things:

1. Take a deep breath.
2. Realize that It's okay to feel this way. It is! We have these feelings for a reason. But I don't need to dwell on it. I don't need to wallow in it. I can feel it and get on with the rest of life.
3. Look around and realize that I have much more than I ever thought I would have. That like the quote, I have in my life, at this very moment, things that I had only dreamed of.

Some days when the house is blissfully (and rarely) quiet and I'm folding little girl clothes or picking up trucks and farm animal pieces it dawns on me that I have once dreamed of this. As silly as that sounds, I had dreamed of living this life - even those little things mean so much to me and I am so thankful for those moments that I realize how lucky I am. And all this jealousy and upset feelings just seems so trivial.

But in the meantime, I will feel the feelings and then let them drift away in the wind. And though I am going through some tough times lately, I know things will be okay.

(And seriously, listening to a random mix radio and Ingrid Michaelson's song "Be Ok" Song just came on. Perfection!)